I have an obsession with a nearly fifteen year old anime called Outlaw Star. It’s only claim to fame in America is having run Adult Swim for a few months nearly ten years ago.

Lacking enough thematic or artistic innovation to appeal to Cowboy Bebop fans nor enough adolescent silliness to attract Sailor Moon fans, it never really found it’s niche here.

Which is to say, you probably know nothing about it. But I love it. Don’t know why. When I’m sick, I like to watch it on DVD.

So I’m going to write about as if you did know about it and indulge in some embarrassing, overgrown fanboy behavior.

Let’s just dive in then, shall we?

I am struck by how the ghost of the memory of ‘Hot Ice’ Hilda haunts the hero, Jean Starwind. The first so-called ‘outlaw’ he meets (‘outlaw’ referring less to status, re: the legal system, than a certain independent space travelers – more ‘outlaw’ like a biker gang [which may still indulge in criminal behavior] than outlaw like ‘I have the death sentence in six systems’ [and yes, I was quoting Star Wars) becomes the model for him, even though she dies (though dies as she lived, committed to her ‘outlaw’ principles) within a couple of days of their meeting.

Jean recalls some of her words on a couple of occasions throughout the 26 episode series (Hilda died during the fourth episode), almost as if conversing with ghost.

She is a mother figure (Jean has flashbacks to incidents of his time with his father, but there is nothing about his mother; and when his father dies, he appears to be orphaned), an older sister exposing her little brother to the exciting world ahead of him (though, in this case, it’s more about pirates
and space ships than taking him to his first college keg party), and also lover (though it’s not clear whether they ever actually have sex, but she is clearly an object of sexual desire).

Though the ostensible love story is between Jean and the android Melfina, their relationship is pretty platonic. Not necessarily brother and sister, but perhaps like the girl who has a crush on her older brother’s friend. This is in contrast to Jean’s feelings towards Hilda, who represents desire in all its forms – the desire for sex, for adventure, for knowledge of the path one should take. He wants Melfina for the companionship, but it is always the memory of Hilda he turns to in order to show him the way.